Time travel

then

now

Life is going by too fast.   I was warned by many who had trod this path before, that the early years of life with 2 children born so close together would pass by in a blur.  I think these words were meant to comfort, but instead I took them as a warning.  

Today I was reminded of them, and of my resolute determination to 

enjoy. every. minute. 

Kashie is 6 months old today.  That seems impossible, and thinking back to those beginning days, I sadly concede that much of the time between then and now has indeed gone by much too fast.  I have been guilty of wasting precious opportunities to revel in the fleeting stages of babyhood, and of wishing away the present moment in hopes of easier, brighter days ahead.   Exactly what I didn't want to do.  

I stay home with my children, largely because I am extremely jealous and possessive of their childhood.  I want to be the one who gets to soak up every minute of their growing up, instead of hearing about it from a caregiver and missing moments, tender, sweet, exhausting, hilarious, trying, or whatever they may be. 

But just because I am here at home, does not guarantee I am HERE with them, NOW. 

And that would be a tragic shame if I missed IT even whilst being bodily present. 

This is not where I originally meant to go with this post, but perhaps I am a wee bit melancholy that I will never be the mother to a newborn ever again.  All of those amazing and wondrous "firsts" that happen in the first few months will be mine to experience in memory only.  

So we will move forward, like everyone must... facing the future in anticipation of all that lies ahead and remembering the past fondly and somewhat wistfully.  

And as the baby of our family grows oh-so-quickly,  a small part of me will hope that the next six months go a little slower, even if I know they won't.